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Posted by on May 30, 2012 in Books and Movies | 0 comments

Girl Walks Into A Bar by Rachel Dratch

Over the semester I was elbow deep in Pyschology text books, and it makes free-reading near impossible. This summer I am gobbling up all of the books I missed out on all year long. First and foremost, I read the Hunger Games, but it feels sort of foolish talking about a book damn-near everyone has read and beat to death. Obviously I loved it, obviously I did not like the ending (you drag out a love story for three books and then sum the resolution up in two sentences?! OH HELLL NO), and obviously, Katniss Everdeen is a fierce bitch. That’s all I have to say about that!

I think it’s hilarious that went I got my one and a half minutes of fame on getoffmyinternets, they mentioned I need to “read more” because my review of Portia De Rossi’s the Unbearable Lightness doesn’t count. Um, raise your hand if you want me to review War and Peace? It made me laugh. I think we all know how A Tale of Two Cities Ends….and if you have read most of the classics (which, duh, I have) then what’s left is new and interesting books! I am not a fan of murder mystery, and not really fiction either. I find that the old adage that truth is stranger than fiction to be absolutely true, and why read something crazy only to remember it’s fake in the end? You can read something just as crazy that really happened! Super popular fiction that really speaks to the human experience is something I don’t mind reading, otherwise, I tend to stick to nonfiction and celebrity memoirs!

My first ever book review on this website was Tina Fey’s Bossypants, and to this day I have not laughed harder reading a book. I keep trying to chase this experience of being in tears from laughing too hard, but every other author than Fey keeps coming up short. Such was the case with Girl Walks Into A Bar, the new book by SNL alumni Rachel Dratch.

Let me say this upfront, I did NOT like this book. I really thought it would be a funny, witty story about time spent at Saturday Night Live, the explanation of the 30 Rock debaucle (Jenna Mulroney was ALMOST played by Dratch), and then some hilarious stories of dating strangers until she gets pregnant from a casual affair she was having. This story really has the makings of a good book.

What muddies the plot is that most of the book is overshadowed by Dratch’s bitter diatribe about her lack of steady job since SNL. She opens the book discussing why she can’t get a job, how she hasn’t been in anything since SNL, doesn’t get any good movie offers. Already ten pages in you feel like you are reading the sad story of a sorry job-less actress.

The Second City and SNL bits are interesting, but she probably could have gone into further detail about her time there. I mean she was at Saturday Night Live for SEVEN YEARS. Spill some dirt, girl! Instead, it feels hurried as she rushes to the even worse part of the book-the middle-where Dratch rehashes bad dating in New York City. These stories of blind dates and missed connections could, again, be fodder for hilarious material, but rather than a Sex and the City-you’ll-never-believe-this method of story telling, Dratch lingers on unimportant details, such as the standard “then he said he’d call, and he didn’t, so I called, but we missed each other, so he called again.” Snooze!

Truthfully, after several not-so-funny or even outrageous date stories, where Dratch is still reminding you she is jobless, I just couldn’t take it anymore. Dratch left me feeling like she wrote this book because she couldn’t afford to pay her bills with acting anymore. I couldn’t even finish it! That’s a big deal for me in terms of books, but at some point, the pay off just doesn’t seem worth it anymore.

So dear readers, you now know all you need to know about this book and Rachel Dratch! Skip the book or spill your thoughts on it! If you’re hungry for a funny Tina Fey style book, just read hers again.

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